Issue #440: A New "Third Place"
Good morning. It’s Tuesday, March 25th.
In today’s email:
Learn: A New “Third Place”
Try: Find Your Tribe
Laugh: Never Where We Want to Be
In the News: Reprogramming Your Heart
Stat of the Day
The number of Americans working 100% from home - about 14% of the adult workforce. (SuperSaaS)
Learn
A New “Third Place”
Imagine going all day without a meaningful, in-person conversation with someone.
For some of us it might not be that hard (see Stat of the Day).
My wife has a colleague in Boston who is single and works from home. She recently just took a new job that is in-office 3 days a week because she craved real interaction with other humans - not just what you get on Zoom.
We don’t get oxytocin - the bonding neurotransmitter that our brains need to feel safe and happy. It only comes from real-world eye contact and actual human touch.
Check out this video from Arthur Brooks:
But it’s not just getting back to the office - it’s having real meaningful conversations; actually connecting with the other person.
In his latest book, “How to Know a Person” David Brooks (no relation) dives into how we can change our superficial exchanges - when you buy a coffee or checkout from the grocery store or even the mindless response we give when you talk to your friends “hey - how are you doing? Good, you?”
It’s about going deeper to really connect with someone.
What’s going on in his or her life?
Can you relate?
Can you be a sounding board?
Is there something to laugh about together?
I think it’s why we’re trying to find more places to connect.
Often called “third places” - not home or work, but a place for people to come together.
It could be churches, cafes, bars, gyms, parks - really any place to bring people together.
Some people are doubling down on church - but only 44% of Americans say they pray on a daily basis.
I’ve always felt like the gym served as a third place for me. But while I’m building some camaraderie with other people in the class as we work in groups to complete a workout - it’s still superficial. I can go to the gym for a year and not know much more than the names and how many box jumps a person can do.
Similarly - if you just set up your laptop to work “in public” it’s doubtful many people are trying to strike up a conversation with you - instead focused on their own deadlines while wearing “stay away” headphones.
That’s why I think we’re going to see a massive increase in intentional, alternative, new “third places” - like what my good friend Jordy Cohen is doing with “Boulder Open Space”, a community committed to conscious connection.
But these can be intimidating for people that maybe don’t want to be put on the spot or need a distraction to get into the full sharing mode.
That’s why I love what another friend of mine, Jason Will, is helping create with group guided sauna and cold plunge sessions.
We’ve covered the benefits of both hot and cold - I like doing 3 sets of 15 min sauna/3 min plunge to really jumpstart my day.
But doing this on your own misses a huge opportunity - dealing with those extreme situations is tough. Doing it together makes it easier and connects you with the other people in the frigid water right next to you.
There’s a self selection of people that opt into sauna/cold plunge - they want more energy right now and are trying to maximize their longevity - so you’ve already got something in common.
With trained guides leading the way - the group can share questions that create meaningful connections and open up about what’s going on in that person’s life on that day.
“This has the potential to change communities. I believe people are yearning or aspiring for connection on a deeper level and this is a ticket to create those deeper connections.”
Would love to see more groups like Revivery (opening soon here in Tampa) scale across the country.
It’s much more powerful than going into a closet of a sauna by yourself and then leaving after 30-45 min without talking to anyone.
Imagine instead, a place to bring people together to share, recharge, and live their best life.
Whatever your preference - find your tribe, find your place and get some of your oxytocin. Because life is meant to be shared.
Try
Find Your Tribe
Find your group - outside your immediate family (or with them) - that you consistently want to connect with in person.
Make an effort to get to know these people (take a cue from “How to Know Someone”) by asking one more question than what feels natural and really listening to what they say.
Whether it’s 1x per week or 1x per month - you’ll feel better by increasing your human connection.
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Laugh
Never Where We Want to Be
H&L in the News
Yogurt - The Surprisingly Safe Superfood: How long can yogurt really sit out? Learn the science behind spoilage, safe storage tips, and how to use up every last spoonful—plus why not all yogurts are created equal. (NYTimes)
Reprogramming Immunity for Heart Repair: Scientists are exploring how to tweak macrophage behavior to unlock heart regeneration. By guiding immune cells to repair damaged tissue, this cutting-edge research could transform treatments for heart disease and failure. (Source)
Mastering Friction for Peak Performance: Workplace friction isn’t always bad - knowing when to remove it and when to embrace it can boost productivity, creativity, and collaboration. Learn how to become a “trustee of time” and eliminate unnecessary organizational drag. (Big Think)
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